Get yourself some high heels. Those will add a few inches to your height, that of course is, if those cowboy boots of yours aren't cutting it for you.
There is an operation in china that you can get your monk-doctor to perform where they saw your leg bones in half, then stretch the gap and let them heal back together, filling in the gap. That is one way that you can get taller. People do this because height is regarded as a measure of your personal worth. That's why you are so worthless midget, because you're freakishly short and weird. Personally, if I were a miniature mutant like you, I'd get the Chinese procedure done to make myself taller, only instead of letting the bones heal back together, I'd have artificial knees implanted in the gaps, so then you'd have two knees on each leg.
There is nothing wrong with being short.
